Passages

Hello!

It of course has been a bit since my last post! I seem to be in that kind of pattern these days, and maybe that actually works better 'cause then I may have more to say that is of some value, at least I hope so.

I decided to call this post "passages" because I am sitting in my daughter's condo supervising her move to Cleveland, Ohio. She is studying for the summer in Oxford, England. She is a teacher and is working towards her masters degree in literature, so that she can be an even more effective instructor to this new group of kids she will be in charge of this coming school year. That in itself is a passage!

Passages are interesting. They are actually an ongoing part of life, kind of like the ebb and flow of tides. As with the tidal change, kids change, parents change and families change. Sitting here, of course I am thinking about change. A big change is in progress right now! Our youngest daughter, having accepted a new job in a different state, is making a big change. She is moving to a new area, Cleveland Ohio. She has been there only a few times. She went for the interview, found a new place to live and now is taking that next step to relocate. Move, change begin anew. As her new passage begins, so does one for my husband and myself. We now have all 3 of our children living in different states!

In an earlier post I spoke to a question I was asked by a merchant in our small town who knows all of my children and what they are up to. He had asked didn't I miss my children when they were not geographically nearby? I of course said yes! But, here is the thing, I have had and am continuing to have the opportunity to design my life, on my terms. I owe that same courtesy and opportunity to my children.

My husband and I have guided our children through the passages of infancy, childhood, adolescence, the teen years, college and early adulthood. Looking back, it is amazing to be at this place, this passage, this time to realize that all 3 of our kids are grown ups...architects of their own lives.

I have the pleasure of working with young parents in my job as a preschool teacher, and get the chance each year to watch these parents grow, evolve and move through a passage in their parenting as they launch their children into the world of organized "school". I love this opportunity! I really love what I do, working with the parents as well as their lovely children. I think that part of my job is to see if I can help these young parents navigate their own passage through this phase of parenting. The letting go, the trusting of their children to someone else. Allowing their children room to discover and become more independent, self aware, and self confident. The very beginnings of letting go, which will continue throughout their life as their children grow. The start of cultivating, encouraging, supporting children in their attempts to design their own lives. A life that plays to each child discovering and embracing their interests, their strengths, their desires. One of the basic tenets of good parenting; help children become the best possible version of themselves, a version created in their image, not yours!

So, as I sit here and reflect on this passage of ours, my daughters, my husbands and mine, I think to what I hope is each parent's wish. The ability to help your children become who they are meant to be. The ability to give your children all that they need throughout each passage of their lives. To "fill up their buckets" to be present in their lives, to be aware, to love unconditionally. After all that, then take the time to celebrate when they move forward, move on and even move to Cleveland Ohio to being their own next chapter. A chapter I can not wait to read!

Until next time,

Pam

p.s. coming soon...part 2, next up a move to New York!