Hello All!
So, by family style I don't mean buffet!
Last night we were at a family birthday dinner for our oldest daughter, Anne. She had invited a good friend of hers along. We were enjoying dinner, and celebrating. We laughed a lot and told stories about our family and my daughter's husband's family and my daughter in law Megan's family and then... we got to the part of the evening where it was coffee time.
My husband likes his coffee super sweet...and we keep trying to have him give up Sweet and Low, (not with much success) so Anne's mother in law pulled out a container of small pills that are a sweetener she carries from Europe. She passed the container over to Bill ( my husband) and this is where it got interesting. Anne commented that it looked like we were passing small drugs out... and then she proceeded to share with her friend, Katlyn, ( sorry Caitlin?) the story of her brother's run in with me, his mother about an hysterical misunderstanding that happened in his senior year of high school. Surmise it to say that I accused him of all sorts of things due to circumstantial evidence, and really put his feet to the fire...not literally of course, I do pride myself on being a good Mom! The story involved police and hospitals and lots and lots of me yelling at our son, Bill.
Katlyn, at this point, was in hysterics. She said that at her house, if this would have happened, her Mom or Dad or someone would have thrown all the contraband out, and that would have been it. They never would have taken it to the level that I chose to...AND there we go! Family Styles!
I like to pride myself on that fact that my husband and I have succeeded at raising 3 competent, smart, caring and quality individuals. Yes, of course that is my opinion, but here, it is the only one that counts! (I have though, received independent collaboration) Here is the point: I truly believe that kids need all they can get from us in terms of guidance and clear vision and accountability. I guess some kids will turn out fine without that, and maybe they are genetically wired to be successful no matter what, but I think (yes I used the crazy word "but") without parents who hold their kids accountable and set limits and boundaries and actually discipline them, society would be complete anarchy!
So, today if your kid does something bad, or you are not sure if he has done something bad, or you are thinking her may have done something bad....BUST HIM! Kids need us to show them the way to be. The way to be responsible and accountable. They have plenty of friends, and only 1 set of parents.
Be the bad guy when you should!!
You'll have great stories to share later!
Until next time,
Pam
Monday, March 25, 2013
Thursday, March 21, 2013
Tonight
Hello!
I sit here tonight thinking about going to New York tomorrow to visit with the lovely Max, our grandson and I wonder....how does life go so very fast? I think of my grandmother who used to say that time went faster the older you became.... Well, I think she was right!
Here's to enjoying and participating and being present in every minute, even the ones we would like to forget!
Enjoy!
Pam
I sit here tonight thinking about going to New York tomorrow to visit with the lovely Max, our grandson and I wonder....how does life go so very fast? I think of my grandmother who used to say that time went faster the older you became.... Well, I think she was right!
Here's to enjoying and participating and being present in every minute, even the ones we would like to forget!
Enjoy!
Pam
Thursday, March 14, 2013
Quick thought
Hello!
Celebrate your kids today for the people they are, congratulate yourself on helping them become those people and forgive yourself any and all imperfections you have as a parent. After all, perfect is boring!
:) Pam
Friday, February 15, 2013
Friday...
Hello!
I was trying to think of something clever to write about today. I started by looking at the photos on my i photo. I realized that they tell a great story. I of course only know how to work part of that whole i photo thing.... I have at least advanced to being able to open it and actually send files! That for me is a great triumph, baby steps yes, but for me great!
So, as I looked at the latest import, I realized that all my photos are about family and places and events we have all been at together. There are photos of trips and travels and graduations and birthdays and weddings and now....BABIES! Actual new little people that are the next generation in this family.
What a cool thing...family! Yes, I know we all have those stories and events that make us want to pull our hair out, and even in my case there are some people that make me want to pull a lot of my hair out. I would be funny looking and maybe just accepting that we don't get to pick our family, is a better idea. I was talking with my brother yesterday and we used that age old line " You can pick your friends and your nose, but you can not pick your family." And, maybe that is exactly how it should be. The whole big jumbled mess of love and angst and triumph that means family.
So, maybe on this Friday, pause and celebrate and enjoy even those most annoying family members and know that family is what life is all about.
Happy weekend!
Until next time,
Pam
I was trying to think of something clever to write about today. I started by looking at the photos on my i photo. I realized that they tell a great story. I of course only know how to work part of that whole i photo thing.... I have at least advanced to being able to open it and actually send files! That for me is a great triumph, baby steps yes, but for me great!
So, as I looked at the latest import, I realized that all my photos are about family and places and events we have all been at together. There are photos of trips and travels and graduations and birthdays and weddings and now....BABIES! Actual new little people that are the next generation in this family.
What a cool thing...family! Yes, I know we all have those stories and events that make us want to pull our hair out, and even in my case there are some people that make me want to pull a lot of my hair out. I would be funny looking and maybe just accepting that we don't get to pick our family, is a better idea. I was talking with my brother yesterday and we used that age old line " You can pick your friends and your nose, but you can not pick your family." And, maybe that is exactly how it should be. The whole big jumbled mess of love and angst and triumph that means family.
So, maybe on this Friday, pause and celebrate and enjoy even those most annoying family members and know that family is what life is all about.
Happy weekend!
Until next time,
Saturday, January 19, 2013
Just how it is...
Hello!
Short thought today....
When we were in Austin for our son's wedding....and I was looking at him and he was so obviously happy it made me happy....and Anne, our oldest said she was really happy, and that when her new baby son was happy, she was happy....I thought....and THAT is how it goes.
It starts the minute children are born....when they are happy, we are happy....and that is just how it is.
Happy weekend! (At least until someone is not :))
Pam
Short thought today....
When we were in Austin for our son's wedding....and I was looking at him and he was so obviously happy it made me happy....and Anne, our oldest said she was really happy, and that when her new baby son was happy, she was happy....I thought....and THAT is how it goes.
It starts the minute children are born....when they are happy, we are happy....and that is just how it is.
Happy weekend! (At least until someone is not :))
Pam
Wednesday, January 9, 2013
Right there...
Hello All!
This morning, as I was trying to get myself motivated to exercise on our treadmill, I put in an old VCR tape of the Whoopie Goldberg movie Sister Act Two, yes we actually still have an old TV with a built in VCR! I needed motivation and something fun to watch while walking on the treadmill. The movie is one that I hadn't watched for quite awhile. It was fun and got me thinking.
Sister Act Two is not a deep movie, yet some scenes had me running around looking for a pen to write down thoughts. In the film, there is a young girl who really just wants to sing. Her mom is against it, and of course, that is often a theme in movies about teenagers. The Ying and the Yang between parent and child....what we want for them and what they want, our desire to protect, and guide and shelter them from what our life experience tells us, and the harder parts of life. I am sure most parents can relate to that kind of thought process.
I am a new Grandma. Most of you know that. I was talking with Anne last night and listening to her as she is in the earliest of stages of trying to figure out what is good for her son, Max, and why. I listened to all that she was saying, and I am trying to be a good listener and not give opinions unless asked. As I was thinking this morning about all that she and I talked about, and as I watched this silly movie, I decided again that what good parents do best is think about what they want for their kids, watch and listen and learn about their kids, learn what their children want, and then meld the two. It is a balancing act. Figuring out how at each stage of your and your child's life to balance your fears as a parent with the desires and dreams of your children. The ultimate goal is to help our children be who they are meant to become, not what we want them to be.
It is the never ending part of parenting. Trying always to encourage and guide and help our children become all that they are meant to be and keep them safe and well through the process.
On to Part Two... can't wait to see all that baby Max becomes. Of course right now he is working on smiling and holding his head up. His parents, Anne and Patrick, are encouraging him every step of the way!
Hey we all started right there...
Until next time,
Pam
This morning, as I was trying to get myself motivated to exercise on our treadmill, I put in an old VCR tape of the Whoopie Goldberg movie Sister Act Two, yes we actually still have an old TV with a built in VCR! I needed motivation and something fun to watch while walking on the treadmill. The movie is one that I hadn't watched for quite awhile. It was fun and got me thinking.
Sister Act Two is not a deep movie, yet some scenes had me running around looking for a pen to write down thoughts. In the film, there is a young girl who really just wants to sing. Her mom is against it, and of course, that is often a theme in movies about teenagers. The Ying and the Yang between parent and child....what we want for them and what they want, our desire to protect, and guide and shelter them from what our life experience tells us, and the harder parts of life. I am sure most parents can relate to that kind of thought process.
I am a new Grandma. Most of you know that. I was talking with Anne last night and listening to her as she is in the earliest of stages of trying to figure out what is good for her son, Max, and why. I listened to all that she was saying, and I am trying to be a good listener and not give opinions unless asked. As I was thinking this morning about all that she and I talked about, and as I watched this silly movie, I decided again that what good parents do best is think about what they want for their kids, watch and listen and learn about their kids, learn what their children want, and then meld the two. It is a balancing act. Figuring out how at each stage of your and your child's life to balance your fears as a parent with the desires and dreams of your children. The ultimate goal is to help our children be who they are meant to become, not what we want them to be.
It is the never ending part of parenting. Trying always to encourage and guide and help our children become all that they are meant to be and keep them safe and well through the process.
On to Part Two... can't wait to see all that baby Max becomes. Of course right now he is working on smiling and holding his head up. His parents, Anne and Patrick, are encouraging him every step of the way!
Hey we all started right there...
Until next time,
Pam
Thursday, December 20, 2012
Ah....First Christmas AND a Wedding....
Hello All!
First Christmas, and a Wedding!
I am not even sure how to process all the stuff that is going on....
Life has so many events and moments and parts, and evolutions, you know what I mean.
In light of all that happened in our country this last week, I am taking time to embrace all that is good...relishing the moments, remembering to pause and appreciate.
So, this next week will be a First Christmas, and then a wonderful celebration, the marriage of our son and his lovely bride....
Blessings....
Can't wait!
Happy and healthy holidays!
Until next year,
Pam
First Christmas, and a Wedding!
I am not even sure how to process all the stuff that is going on....
Life has so many events and moments and parts, and evolutions, you know what I mean.
In light of all that happened in our country this last week, I am taking time to embrace all that is good...relishing the moments, remembering to pause and appreciate.
So, this next week will be a First Christmas, and then a wonderful celebration, the marriage of our son and his lovely bride....
Blessings....
Can't wait!
Happy and healthy holidays!
Until next year,
Pam
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